


The End

by shewhoisntnamed44



Category: All for the game- Nora Sakavic
Genre: Angst, M/M, Why Did I Write This?, a lot of it, idky I wanna write this., vampire fucking au I guess tho wait for it
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-25
Updated: 2017-08-04
Packaged: 2018-10-23 23:40:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 14
Words: 12,511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10729698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shewhoisntnamed44/pseuds/shewhoisntnamed44
Summary: The day Andrew Minyard died, Neil Josten died too.Nathaniel Wesninski was back and he wasn't planning on leaving this time.Nathaniel fucking Wesninski was back. And the world was going to feel his wrath.





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ((Based on this: http://korakos.tumblr.com/post/135276970652/i-am-already-filling-with-regret-but-what-would))

The gunshot came from nowhere. One minute they were jogging and the next minute  
_BANG_  
and all Neil saw was Andrew falling to the ground.

His heart stopped. He was incapable of doing anything. Blood was pooling around Andrew's unconscious body.

" _Andrew_.", Neil whispered.  
Neil pressed shaky fingers to the wound, his hands coming back slick with blood. Andrew didn't reply. Why didn't he reply?

"Andrew," he whispered again, "wake up please." Andrew looked so vulnerable. He looked so much at odds compared to what Neil was feeling inside.

"Andrew wake up!", he screams this time.  
_Wake up wake up wake up no no no no no_.  
Neil couldn't think. Couldn't breathe. This obviously wasn't happening. It was another one of his nightmares he'd wake up from very soon. Andrew would be lying there next to him. He'd feel the pressure of Andrew's hand on his neck in just a second. That's all he had to do, last one more second and then he'd be fine. This was all a nightmare and he'd wake up in no time.  
Only it wasn't.

"Andrew come _on_.", Neil couldn't even talk anymore. His voice was hoarse. His throat felt completely raw. Had he been screaming? His heart and head felt like minced meat.  
He swept a hand through Andrew's hair, horrified to see the blonde streaking red at contact.  
How was there so much blood? Why did this all feel so real?  
"Andrew.", Neil whispered for the last time. " _Please_.", he said as he touched his forehead to Andrew's, knotted his hands in Andrew's now red hair, like he'd done a million times before, and closed his own eyes. Tears leaked from his eyes onto Andrew's. But they still didn't open? Why didn't they fucking open? Why wasn't he waking up?

Neil was unaware of the man who'd fled immediately on his bike after firing that shot. Unaware of the crowd that's gathered around them. Unaware of the fingers trying to pry him off of Andrew's body. Unaware of the ambulances and the police and the foxes.  
Unaware of everything but the gaping hole in his chest. Of the darkness overtaking his mind.  
All that mattered was holding on. If he could hold on to Andrew for just one more second he'd be up, annoyed at Neil. Adding another figure to the infinite percent Andrew had maintained for Neil. Kissing Neil and telling him he hates him. If this wasn't a nightmare, Andrew was definitely asleep. He only looked this peaceful while sleeping. If only he could hold on just a bit longer Andrew would wake up. All he had to do was hold on. _Just hold on for some more time_.

But Andrew didn't wake up. And he never would. But it was too early for Neil to accept that. He couldn't. He _wouldn't_. He was falling down a hole, one which he knew he'd never escape. Not without Andrew to pull him back out.

Time was like glass. Broken into so many pieces. Every edge pricked him and drew blood. He didn't know how he'd ended up in the shower. Didn't know how he'd reached home. His skin crawled but he felt completely numb. He looked at his reflection in the mirror, touched a hand to his face, and _smiled_.

The day Andrew Minyard died, Neil Josten died too.  


Nathaniel Wesninski was back and he wasn't planning on leaving this time. 

_Nathaniel fucking Wesninski was back. And the world was going to feel his wrath_.


	2. Chapter 2

In the next eight months, with hardly any sleep, Nathaniel mastered the art of cutting a man from throat to groin. The art of drawing as much blood as he could from a person, in the most painful way, without death interrupting.  
"How?", a bewildered Renee had asked him at the end of those eight months, when he had finally managed to hold a knife above her throat. That's when he knew his lessons with Matt were paying off.

The foxes knew this was the worst thing that had ever happened to Neil, including years on the run, Riko's torture and Baltimore. They didn't understand though.  
Allison had Renee. Dan had Matt. Nicky had Erik. Kevin had Thea and Exy. Even Aaron had Katelyn. Who did he have? _His reason was gone._

"Don't act as if his death affected you more than me. You knew him for 4 years. I was his twin for fucks sake. If I can play then so can you.", a red eyed Aaron had told him one night at Court. The last practise Nathaniel would ever go to. He'd announced that night he was quitting exy. Kevin was furious, but knew better than to say anything.  
Nathaniel smiled at him. It was laced with barbed wire. It scared the foxes. They did not recognise this Neil.  
"How bout I kill Katelyn and see how you continue to play huh?"  
"Don't bring Katelyn into this."  
"Well I can't bring up Andrew. He's dead, isn't he?", he whispered, still smiling.   
Aaron was shocked into silence. He lunged at Neil and woke up two hours later with a broken nose.

"I'm leaving.", he'd told the foxes that same night.  
"Where are you going? When will you be back?", Matt asked him.  
"I'm going to England for a while to the Hatfords. I need to get away from here. As for when I'll be back, I don't know."  
The next morning Nathaniel began to pack. All he was going to carry was one wheeled suitcase. A drastic change from his duffel. He packed the binder with the money safely in his bag and proceeded to remove his armbands. All of a sudden, he couldn't breathe. Visions of An-  
No. He was a Wesninski, he reminded himself and continued packing.   
This was the last time he'd be wearing his armbands. Let his scars be on display. When people saw them, they would not pity him, they'd fear him. Nathaniel would make sure of it. He gingerly placed his armbands at the bottom of his suitcase.  
Andrew's were buried with him.  
He didn't take anything else from Neil's life. He'd not shed a single tear since the day Andrew died. Not one. He took comfort in the fact that he was going to shed blood. A lot of it.

The foxes were waiting for him near his car. A black Audi A4. He'd sold the Maserati. Nicky didn't want anything to do with his dead cousin's car and he didn't care enough about Aaron to ask. He hated Aaron's face more than he ever had in those eight months.  
"Call us when you reach. Please be safe Neil. Come back to us okay?", Dan told him as she squeezed the life out of him.  
"Guess it's time to say goodbye kid.", Wymack knew Neil was never coming back again. He knew his foxes well. Wymack hugged him just as fiercely as Dan had, already missing his mouthy fox, who'd over those eight months had lost all of his loudness. He wasn't Neil Josten anymore, wasn't the boy.. _the_ _man_ who'd played like his life depended on it. Now, there was none left in him. 

Nicky was still crying when Nathan checked his rear view mirror. Wymack had an arm around Abby, Matt and Dan clung to each other. Even Aaron, who was leaning against Katelyn, had come to tell him goodbye. Allison and Renee and Kevin were invincible pillars of strength. He knew they'd protect his foxes. His family. They were all he had. They were all he needed. They were going to be all right. They had to be. He'd already accepted parting from them when he'd parted from Andrew. But yet, another needle pierced his heart, when he saw them like that. This was the image of them he wanted to take with him forever. This memory would be seared in his brain. _His_ _family_. But that was another life ago. 

_Nathaniel Wesninski_ he repeated over and over in his head as he stepped on the accelerator and left them all behind.


	3. Chapter 3

_Watching Andrew sleep wasn't something Neil did often, or so he told himself. It felt different watching someone sleep. It fascinated Neil as to how a persons face smoothened out, free of all stress and worry when they slept, at least when they weren't having nightmares. It felt like a luxury he'd dared to afford._

_"You're staring junkie. I'm going to gauge your eyes out if you don't stop.", Andrew said, eyes which had been shut only a minute open, now open, hazel eyes staring right at him._  
_"I wasn't staring."_  
_"I told you to stop lying to me months ago."_  
_"No you didn't, you told me to stop acting stupid."_  
_"Shut up."_

_Andrew hooked his fingers in Neil's collar to pull him down. Out of nowhere Andrew's fingers tightened to the point of bruising at the back of Neil's neck. His mouth curled into an ugly smile, displaying an array of rotten, yellowing teeth. His eyes went black, no pupi-_

_A nightmare. This was all a nightmare_ , Nathaniel thought as he jerked awake, his body covered in sweat, trying to calm his frantic heart rate. _A nightmare_ , he was forced to remind himself. Almost eight months later and nightmares still plagued him. His head pounded, images of Andrew's dead body darkening his thoughts. He wanted to rip his hair out.

He was in his car, a few weeks after he'd left Fox Tower, parked at the airport. One of the first things Nathaniel had done was drive to any place his mother had left something even as minuscule as a penny behind. He'd called one of her contacts and had a new passport and other papers made. Steve Harrison was going to England, not Nathaniel Wesninski. He wasn't that stupid. He'd burnt Neil's phone the first chance he'd gotten and bought a new one.

He left his car in the lot and boarded a plane to London.  
"Hey I'm at Heathrow right now can you come and get me?", he asked Stuart Hartford at 2am on a fucking Monday. He didn't disappoint as sure enough he pulled up in his black BMW forty-five minutes later. "We'll talk later.", he said and started the car.

Stuart "lived" in a quaint little bungalow a few miles outside of London. A great spot for running illegal business or doing any dirty work as there were hardly any people around. Stuart led them both inside the house and into a room situated at the back. The lights hurt Nathaniel's eyes.  
"If you want to stay, talk. And talk fast.", he said twirling a coin on the table in front of them.  
"They killed one of my foxes. The Moriyamas, I mean. As a warning. I wasn't sure at first but the lackeys who came to visit me a few days later confirmed my suspicions.", Nathaniel said casually as if this hadn't ripped his fucking heart open. As if he didn't want tear the world into shreds for what was done to _his fox_. As if he wasn't going to exact every single drop of blood he could for what had happened to his _fucking_ fox.

"Are you that stupid that you're going to risk this? Coming here? You do know I work for the Moriyamas now? If th-"  
"Look I'm not fucking stupid.", Nathaniel said as he leaned forward on the table and looked Stuart dead in the eyes.  
"I know all that. You can help me if you want. I'll find someone else to go to if you don't. All I need is one name. One name and you won't ever see me again."  
"You think they won't go after your remaining foxes once they've realised you're gone?", Stuart inquired.  
"They won't. Killing one of them again will raise suspicions. And they won't hurt them when I can't watch.", Nathaniel didn't fully believe this, but he had to hope.

"And you think they won't find you?"  
"I was on the run for almost a decade, _Uncle_. Don't worry about me, I've learnt quite a few things. Worry about what's to come.", Nathaniel said with a fierce flash of his teeth.  
He was going to burn the Moriyamas to the ground. There wouldn't be enough _ashes_ left for them to rebuild. He had promised himself this.

Stuart looked at Nathaniel for a few minutes, the coin in his fingers now lying flat on the table.  
"Adalie Max. Lyon. That's all I'm telling you. Now get the fuck out."

A few days later, Steve Harrison boarded a plane to France.

 


	4. Chapter 4

Steve Harrison checked into Hotel Carlson near Rue Saint-Jean. It was affordable. Well, Nathaniel could probably afford a private jet with the money his mother had left him but he needed that for other purposes.  
"If you want to proceed with our services press 3. If you want to discontinue press 4. If you wish to speak to someone who can help you press 5."  
Nathaniel tapped 2, 1 and 9 onto his phone.

"Where do you want to go?", a masculine voice asked him. Another trick question, so that unwanted people or those who accidentally got the numbers right would just think they'd called a travel agency. If you got this part wrong the phone would get disconnected and your number blocked. The same numbers were never used twice. Every person was given a answer.  
"Russia.", Nathaniel didn't know why his mother was given this country as a password. That's what was written beside this name in the long list of contacts his mother had left him. He didn't care enough to find out. He just wanted to get through. 

" _Mary_?", a shocked voice whispered through the phone.  
"No, her son Nathaniel."  
The man swore. He was about to cut the line when Nathaniel hurriedly continued-  
"Look my father's dead. And so is my mother. I want to meet you for five minutes. That's it. You owe this to me. You owe this to _her_."  
Nathaniel didn't know what his mother had done for this guy, but it must've been enough because but he agreed to meet him. He copied down the address that was given to him, put on his jacket, and left the room. The address wasn't that far from his hotel. He could jog.

He reached an old warehouse. It looked abandoned and completely bare. Nonetheless, Nathaniel wearily opened the door and stepped inside. It was completely dark. He ventured further into the creepy loft. It was quite big, so he hoped someone was inside. He hadn't come all this way just to return empty handed.

Out of nowhere someone punched him in the gut. And then in the face. Someone hit him again, but it was too dark to see. His knife was out in an instant. The sickening sound of metal slicing through bone nauseated Nathaniel, but he hadn't started this. He'd buried it in his attackers chest. He still wasn't alone. He knew it. A slight sound behind him. A scrape of a foot against wood board, that's all he needed as launched the knife in the dark. The sound of a body hitting the floor confirmed that it had done its job.

Suddenly all the lights in the warehouse came on at once. Nathaniel felt like he was blind.  
"You really are Mary's son.", Patrick Skinski murmured, as he stood up from his chair in one of the far corners of the room. 

Nathaniel didn't answer. He surveyed the damage he'd done. The first man he'd killed was lying in a pool of his own blood. The second one was also on the floor, but with a knife buried in his groin. Nathaniel retrieved the knife and wiped it clean with his attackers shirt. He'd bought it right after he'd reached France and it was expensive. He wasn't going to leave it here.

The man, Patrick Skinski looked impeccable in a black and white tailored suit. He didn't care about the men who had been murdered.  
"This was a test.", Nathaniel calmly said.  
"And you passed with flying colours."  
"Why?"  
"You really think I believed you were the Butcher's son when you called? You're lucky there weren't more men."  
"No. _You're_ lucky there weren't more men, Mr. Skinski.", Nathaniel replied with a grin.  
"What do you want?"  
"Adalie M-"  
" _No_.", Skinski cut him off. "Anyone but her."  
"You're scared?"  
"You're a fool Mr. Wesninski. If you plan to kill he-"  
"I'm not going to kill her. I want her help."  
Patrick laughed.  
"Help? She isn't the kind of person who _helps_."  
"My mother did you a fucking favour. It's time to pay back."  
Patrick didn't reply. He didn't want to get involved in this shit. If this boy did something wrong and it got retraced back to the Skinskis' he would be done.

Nathaniel crossed the room and walked up to Patrick. He got as close as he physically could and pushed his knife into Mr. Skinskis gut, drawing a drop of blood.  
"Let me put it this way Mister. You don't have a choice."  
Patrick was afraid now. Who was this boy? He looked down. Blood stained his suit.  
He nodded.  
"Adalie Max.", Nathaniel repeated "Tell me everything about her."

"Adalie Max. A twenty nine year old, smart as fuck, woman. Lost both her parents when she was twelve. When I say lost I mean she stabbed them while they were asleep. I don't know why. Extremely powerful. She's wanted by the police in atleast twenty countries, but no one has any proper evidence. Hell, even the Pope knows about her. Joined a group of thugs when she was thirteen, killed them all, used their money to start her own empire. Owns a software company as a front to do dirty business. She kills, fucks, does anything you want her to do for the right price. If you don't pay it at the right time, you're never seen again. That's all I know about her."  
"Where can I find her?"  
Patrick hesitated. The knife was pushed deeper in his gut.  
"The Suncross Building. 9 blocks east from here. She owns it."  
The knife was pushed deeper.  
"That's all I know. I promise.", Patrick choked out.  
In the next minute the pressure was gone and so was the boy.

Patrick sighed. He hated getting blood on his suit. 


	5. Chapter 5

Nathaniel knew he couldn't meet Adalie Max, who was slowly starting to terrify him, with only one knife. He wasn't that dumb.

The Suncross Building looked like any other ordinary building from outside. Red sandstone, three to four storeys high with small balconies jutting out of every floor. Only one entrance was visible, but a quick round of the building revealed two exits at the back. Nathaniel knew that there were high possibilities of him not getting out of this building alive tomorrow.  
He went inside.  
A man looked up from the reception, "Yes?"  
"Adalie Max. Could I get an appointment with her?"  
"I'm sorry, there is no one here by that name."  
"Oh, must be my fault."  
That was all he needed.

Nathaniel had four knives, a packet of cigarettes and a gun which was tucked into the waistband of his jeans. Acquiring a gun in France was surprisingly easy.

He'd seen the way the face of the man at the reception had gone blank at the mere mention of Adalie's name. A clean slate. Too blank to be convincing.  
He reached the building at 4am, but it wasn't until 9am that a bronze skinned beauty made her way inside. The way she walked, the power in every step, the surety in her eyes that she could and would cut down anyone in her path, confirmed Nathaniel's suspicions. This was the notorious Adalie Max. She was exactly what he'd  
expected.

The second window on the third floor opened, light streaming through the balcony into the room. Nathaniel pinpricked one of the exits and made his way inside. The key to passing unnoticed in any place was to act as if you belonged. That was how Nathaniel and his mother had survived on the run for so long.  
He made his way to the third floor, surprisingly the building was almost empty.  
He could hear voices coming out of the room. "22nd Street just opposite Saint George Street. Yes. Third floor. Get the job done before 2."  
Nathaniel was waiting for the perfect moment to enter the room when she spoke, "Nathaniel Wesninski. How fucking stupid do you think I am? Grow some fucking balls and come in."

There was no way she could've know-  
This wasn't the time to sit and think. He had to do something. He entered the room.  
The woman emanated power. Even in four inch heels and a dress, Nathaniel knew he'd last less than a minute against her. She reminded him of Allison.

"You have two minutes before I paint this room red with your blood. And don't even _think_ about using those weapons."  
"The Moriyamas killed my family."  
"You can't fix your problems by breaking someone else. Revenge is for children."  
" _The_ _Moriyamas_ _killed_ _my_ _family_.", he repeated, rage burning through his insides. He knew he was playing a dangerous game.  
"I'll do anything you want."  
Now she looked interested.  
"Anything?"  
" _Anything_."  
"Would you kill for me Nathaniel?"  
"Yes.", he replied without the slightest bit of hesitation.  
"I'll bring their blood back in a bag if you'd want."  
"Luck is on your side kid. There is one person too unimportant for my lackeys to kill. Do this for me and I'll consider it."  
"You will have the head by tomorrow."  
She looked at Nathaniel and smiled. This scared him more than anything else.  
"Johnathan Heeds. I'll give you the address."  
"Done."  
She got up. "Oh I'm not done talking, Wesninski."  
She walked over to him. One perfectly manicured finger tilted his chin up. Her brown eyes froze him.

He knew she could break his neck in a second if she wished to. Her teeth flashed as she said-  
"I don't want you to kill _him_ pretty boy. I want you to kill his fourteen year old son. And I do want his blood in a bag, thanks for the suggestion."

 


	6. Chapter 6

"Dan?"  
"Neil? What's wrong?"  
Nathaniel's hands shook with effort to cling onto the phone, his hands still smelling of blood. He couldn't think straight.  
"I killed a boy Dan. H-he was fourteen. I looked him in the eyes as I shot him. I-I tried to apologise-", Nathaniel choked out, a hand pressed to his burning eyes.  
"Fuck Neil. Where are you?"  
_Neil. Neil. Neil._  
_Andrew. The keys. Stay. Nothing. Andrew._  
"Neil?", Dans voice now sounded panicked.  
"Neil goddamnit talk to me. Look whatever you did- we'll get through it. We love you."  
"I'm sorry I called you, it was a mistake."  
_"Neil Josten_. Listen to me. Come home to me. To us. _Please_.", he'd never heard Dan sound so...ragged. So sad.  
"I-I'm sorry I called you Dan. Tell the others I- tell them a thank you. For being-", his voice broke as he continued, "for being everything."  
"NEI-"  
He cut off the line.

Just a few hours ago, Nathaniel had killed a fourteen year old boy. Not that much younger than him. How was he any better than his father? Adalie Max had taken one look at his bloodied state and told him to come meet her two days later. He'd left without a word.

He could still hear the boys screams, screaming for his father, for anyone. The bullet silenced him forever two seconds later. Nathaniel had not stopped to think about what he'd done. He couldn't. He had to _move_ _move_ _move._

He came back to his hotel room. His entire body started shaking. Where was the hand on the back of his neck? Where was-  
He'd called Dan. He needed to be Neil Josten, even if it was just for a minute.

He wondered for a moment whether he should stop. Whether this was too severe. Was revenge worth _this_? He knew this wouldn't be the last time he would kill someone innocent.

 _He was back on the roof. A cigarette in his hand, Andrew by his side._  
_Andrew stole the cigarette from his hand, took a deep drag and blew the smoke in Neil's face. Neil didn't even flinch._  
_Andrew pressed something in Neil's hand along with the cigarette. A key._  
_Neil's brows furrowed in confusion. "What's this for?"_  
_"Home. Few miles away from here."_  
_Everything inside Neil stopped._  
_"You bought a house?"_  
_"You're going to get the furniture if you don't want it to be an empty white piece of shit."_  
_"Okay", Neil said and didn't bother to hide his smile as he looked at Andrew._  
_Andrew studied him for a moment, the bored expression flickered for a second and then settled back in place._  
_"Three hundred percent junkie. Shut it."_  
Home _, Andrew had called it._ Home _, Neil's heart sang._

Andrew was shot two weeks later.

Nathaniel was back in the hotel room. He removed Neil's key ring from his pocket. Three keys. One to the car, one to Columbia. And one to their...home. He couldn't, _wouldn't_ throw these away.  
He shut his eyes and thought about everything Neil had lost. Neil had stopped being a rabbit a long time ago. No, he was the hunter now. And Nathaniel was here to prove it.

"I didn't think you would do it.", Adalie told him two days later. She still looked impeccable. No hint of guilt or a conscience.  
Nathaniel didn't reply.  
"It's time you return the favour."  
"What favour?"  
"Help me destroy the Moriyams. _Bone by fucking bone_."  
"Oh no Nathaniel, one kill does not make me trust or help you, you stupid boy. This game has just begun."

Nathaniel killed and killed and killed whenever he was told to. He'd bought himself a tiny little flat by then. He didn't call anyone now. That was one of the last times he'd ever call the foxes. Every time he killed someone, some part of him just stopped. Stopped being who he was and started being his father. A monster. Some part of him started hating who he was becoming. The other part still roared for vengeance, no matter what it took. His sleep was haunted by nightmares. The women, men, children he'd killed marred his life. It didn't matter. He'd stopped feeling a long time ago.

A few months later, in her office, Adalie smiled at him once again, expression ravenous as she raked her eyes over Nathaniel's face, his scars and said, "Now my little fox, it's time to hunt."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (I wrote this after I read the Baltimore scene for the billionth time ThE FeELS aaH. Too much italics in this chapter eh?) THANK YOU FOR READING!! THE COMMENTS!! THANK YOU FOR THOSE!! THEY ARE MAKING MY DAY AAHH YOU ARE THE BEST :)))


	7. Chapter 7

"How do I know that I can trust you?"  
"You don't."  
Nathaniel went silent.  
"Look,", Adalie said, "I'm going to send one of my men with you. If I do anything suspicious, you can always kill him. And the Moriyamas owe me too."  
"What are you talking about?"  
"They killed my family."  
"I heard you killed them."  
Adalie sighed. "I did, but it was because of them. My parents sold my brother to them, without a thought about him. He was _five_. I killed them before I was next."  
She said this as if she was just asking Nathaniel what he wanted for dinner, as if she wanted to take a walk in the park, as if killing your parents was what every twelve year old did. Maybe she wasn't as bad as he thought.  
"Where is he now? Your brother I mean.."  
Adalie smiled.

A beautiful boy with the same bronze skin as Adalie, green eyes and jet back hair walked in.  
Adalie waved a hand towards him. "He's Max."  
Nathaniel smirked looking at him, "You're Max Max?"  
"My parents were twisted.", he replied with a smile of his own. "You're Nathaniel. The Butcher's son."  
Nathaniel almost corrected him, but then remembered everything. He settled for a simple nod.  
"I heard you were fucking Andrew Minyard. So you like damaged goo-"  
Nathaniel didn't know how it happened. In a blink he was out of his chair and his hands were wrapped around Max's throat.  
" _Don't_ say his name.", Nathaniel said with a lethal calm. "And don't ever, _ever_ call him or anyone else damaged goods you fucker. _You aren't worth the air they breathe._ "  
"Someone's touchy.", Max had the balls to say. Nathaniel's grip on his throat tightened. Max was slowly turning blue. Adalie made no move to come to the rescue of her brother. She knew she would've done the same thing Nathaniel was doing.  
A few seconds passed. Nathaniel grip was tightening every second. Max was so close to blacking out. Adalie decided to move then. She came forward and placed a hand on Nathaniel's shoulder.  
"I'm sorry on his behalf. Now leave him or this deal is off."  
Nathaniel did and Max fell to the floor. Nathaniel debated whether he should kick him in the balls. Then he would know the meaning of _damaged fucking goods._

Nathaniel whirled on Adalie. "Don't you talk. You made me kill a child Ms. Max. A _child_. You are _exactly_ like him."  
Adalie's eyes tightened.  
"And you did it, _Mr. Wesninski_.", she replied in the same chipped, angry tone Nathaniel was using. "So don't go all saint on me. We all have to do things we shouldn't if we aim to get what we want."  
Some of the endless rage in Nathaniel's eyes ebbed, guilt replacing it. He sat back down on his chair and motioned for Adalie to do the same.  
"So where were we?", she asked.  
"You were telling me I have to work with this filth," he said pointing towards her brother, unconscious but breathing, on the floor. "And I was going to give you a list of reasons why I won't."  
"You don't have an option."  
Nathaniel didn't dignify that with a response.  
"What do I have to do?'

"The key to breaking an empire, is not only working from the inside. It's attacking from both ends. Break them from the inside, and drop bombs on them from the outside while doing so. Then there will be nothing left for them to save."  
"And how do you propose we should do that?"  
"You work on the inside, I'll strike from outside. The Matsumotos will help me. They are the ones who drove the Moriyamas out of Japan."  
"You really think Ichirou will let me work for him? How delusioned are you?"  
"Ichirou Moriyama, it seems has been running low on funds this past year. He has started one of his most lucrative organisation again, after three years. I'm going to get you in there."  
Nathaniel still looked confused.

"The Ravens. He's starting them again. In fact he's got quite a good team by now."  
The blood drained from Nathaniel's face as he grasped what Adalie was suggesting. His heart, his lungs, _everything_ stopped.  
"I'm going to put you and that scum," she flicked a looked towards Max, "in the Ravens. You're both going to play for them. Get into Ichirou's good graces. Do whatever it takes, be his bitch for all I care. Play till your life runs out. And then, we take him out. Snatch his empire and destroy it right under his nose. Play for the Ravens. Make them win every single match. _Do whatever it takes_ , but get me a meeting with him by the end of next August. That'll be his last mistake. You have almost eleven months."  
Nathaniel couldn't force himself to breathe. Did she understand the implications of this? He'd have to play against the foxes. _His foxes_. He couldn't do this, but what choice did he have.

So he took a page out of Neil's, Alex's, Stefan's, Chris's book. He got up and left the building without another word.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really really didn't want to do this I'm so sorry.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I got the timeline a bit messed up in the previous chp. THIS takes place in AUGUST and he has until NEXT YEAR'S August to set up the meeting.

Nathaniel hadn't had a cigarette since Andrew died, although he always kept a pack on him. It was something which _Neil_ had done with him and he couldn't afford to be Neil. He would break.  
Still, as Nathaniel rushed out of the Suncross Building the first thing he did was remove a cigarette, light it and take a long drag.  
Inhale. Exhale.  
That's all his mind could bear. He finished the first one in mere seconds, then started another. Max came out of the building, his neck red with the marks Nathaniel's fingers had left.  
"Hey dude, you alright?", he asked.  
"Go away."  
"You just ran out of there like Cerberus was chasing you."  
"Cerberus?"  
"Greek mythology. A three headed dog. I read a _lot_ of Percy Jackson."  
"Who?"  
Max looked sympathetic.  
"Can I have one?", Max asked, eyeing the cigarettes.  
" _No_.", Nathaniel said with such a ferocity it surprised both him and Max.   
"Okay okay", Max said, raising his hands.  
"Look Adalie's waiting on us. I learnt a long time ago not to keep my big sis waiting. And also I-I'm sorry. For what I said before. I had no rig-"  
_"Fuck. Off."_  
Max sighed, "I'm going back. I'm giving you five more minutes to do whatever you have to before I have to come and drag your ass in."  
He disappeared.

 _Think_.  
All Nathaniel had to do was think. There was no way out of this. He'd come this far, he couldn't turn back now. He removed his set of keys from his pocket and ran a thumb over each one. _Home_.  
Just the simple thought of returning to Edgar Allen would have caused Neil to have a panic attack. The rooms, the handcuffs, the tattoos. Kevin would kill him if he knew.

And how could he play against his foxes. They were his people. This would be the biggest betrayal, the biggest lie he would ever tell them, considering everything.   
A vision of Andrew on the beanbag chair, sleeping with his hair all ruffled, flashed before his eyes, quickly replaced with another image of Andrew's blood stained hair and still body.  
Nathaniel's resolve hardened, his heart turned to stone as he stubbed his cigarette and went back inside.

Edgar Allen was as big, as terrifying as he remembered it. Thankfully, due to his reputation and skills the Ravens welcomed him with open arms. Max got in because of Adalie, how or why Nathaniel didn't know nor did he bother to. The stadium still took his breath away. Exy ran in his veins. That was the only thing that hadn't changed. It had been his mother, his father, his family and now it was his vengeance. This was enough to bring a sick smile to his face.

The Nest had been completely destroyed. It had been remade as a top notch dormitory for the school's Exy and football teams. Nathaniel would be sharing with his room with Max, who quite frankly was a pain. He seemed completely at ease, considering the fact he had been here when he was five. Maybe he was too young to remember it? Nathaniel remembered though. Remembered everything with a nauseating clarity.

Everything was empty as it was still August. This brought a sense of deja vu. This empty campus would be filled with completely different people though. The press still wasn't aware he'd signed with the Ravens new lineup.  
After Tetsuji Moriyama, a new coach was appointed. The school refused to disclose her name as she wanted to introduce herself to the whole team first. Nathaniel hoped it wasn't who he thought it was. Calling someone who wasn't Wymack "coach" already left a bitter taste in Nathaniel's mouth.  
He didn't know how he would manage to survive here.  
Dorms had been opened early for him and Max. Whether it was due to him or Adalie's death threats Nathaniel would never know.

The locker room was empty the first time he visited it. The room was no longer the black hell hole it had been before. No, it was now painted in varying shades of red and white. The school's colours were still black and red.  
Nathaniel wanted to throw up when he saw his jersey hanging on the wall.

A black jersey, lined with red at the sleeves and "WESNINSKI" written in the same colour with the number "04". Matt's number.

The jersey, his gear, everything fit him perfectly, but he felt like a renegade. _Red and black_. This felt like a crime, this was a crime, he remembered as he stared at himself in the locker rooms mirror.  
_Traitor traitor traitor_ , every heartbeat screamt. Although the worst wasn't over yet. No, he was going to meet his new team tomorrow. Thirteen new Ravens. And his coach. 


	9. Chapter 9

As soon as he'd entered the lounge with Max by his side that morning, he was greeted with the type of cacophony that could only be associated with a group of strangers. Few silent stretches mingled with the excitement of meeting someone new.  
Nathaniel walked in and sat down in one of the farther corners of the room, away from everyone. Not all of Nathaniel's new teammates were that idiotic, but that didn't mean he had to socialise. Everyone, except Max, who had hardly left his side since they'd come here.

"You don't have to babysit me you know? I'm not going to run away or do something to sabotage this.", he said quietly, not wanting anyone to hear.  
Max was quiet for a few minutes.  
"I'm not used to being alone. Since I was a kid I've always had someone, mostly Adalie, beside me. Even when I was _sold_ ", Max's voice turned bitter at that word, "I had another kid with me. I'm just not used to this, I'll try to leave you alone from now."  
This was completely at odds from the way Nathaniel had been raised. He was never used to someone beside him till Andrew. Even that was gone now.  
"It's okay. I don't mind it that much, I just need to be alone sometimes.", he replied, forcing himself not to think.

Max's eyes latched onto to Nathaniel's. Nathaniel did not understand the expression on Max's face. He opened his mouth to say something when-  
"Hi. I'm Eleanor.", a brown haired girl said, her hand outstretched.  
Nathaniel shook it.  
"Nathaniel."  
"I know. I mean, I'm not a creep, but everyone knows."  
Nathaniel was confused.  
"Oh come on. You're Neil Josten. Number 10. One of the best strikers in the South. Foxes right? And only one exy player has scars like yours."  
Something tightened in Nathaniel's chest. It threatened to shred him apart. His scars. They were on an unabashed display, but that didn't mean he expected people to comment regarding them.   
"Yes. I used to play for the Foxes.", he answered as calmly as he could.  
Eleanor sat down on the empty seat beside him.  
"I'm not going to pretend like I'm not curious, but I won't ask you why you switched to the team you used to detest till you want to tell me."  
Nathaniel wanted to tell her that she would have to wait an eternity, or even longer, for that to happen. Besides, he would always detest the Ravens.  
Thankfully, she noticed Max seated on his other side.  
"Eleanor."  
"Max."  
They shook hands too, with Nathaniel in the middle. They started talking about something mindless, a new movie or an actor, Nathaniel couldn't care less.

Fortunately, his coach walked in, a board with a paper clipped in her hand.  
Unfortunately, his coach was none other than Theodora Muldani. One of the only women on Court. The only person who'd been offered a contract with them twice. Thea Muldani, a woman born for the field. Thea Muldani, Kevin Day's girlfriend. Former Raven, her necklace containing her Raven number proudly standing out on her t-shirt.  
Nathaniel paled, no one noticed. The room had gone quiet. Everyone was aware of who'd just walked in.  
Thea's eyes wandered across the room, her eyes searching every one of her team members.  
"I'm Theodora Muldani. Your new coach.", she spoke clearly, her voice carrying across the room.  
She looked at the board she'd walked in with. One by one she called out each of their names and confirmed everyone's presence. Her eyes lingered over Nathaniel when she called his name.

"You all are Ravens and you have one chance to prove it to the world. Your practices will start everyday at five am. They will continue till nine maybe ten am. We will meet again in the afternoon, at four pm and you all will practice till the time I tell you to stop. When college starts, morning practices will be at the same time and we'll figure the rest out later. For now, try remembering this much. If you don't, life is going to get extremely difficult. On court, discipline is everything. If you are late, I'll make sure you face the consequences. Do not bitch about practice timings to me, you all have willingly signed up for this. Any other problems, feel free to come to me. Now leave. This is the last day of your freedom. Tomorrow, we begin."

One by one, people left the room.  
"Nathaniel," Thea called out to him, "wait."  
Everyone left. Nathaniel wasn't nervous to be in a room alone with Theodora Muldani. He wondered if he should be.  
"I'm making you captain. Your jersey number will be changed to one."  
"N-"  
"You do not have a choice here. If you don't want it, leave. You're the only player on this team with enough experience to deserve this."

 _She knew. She knew he was a Fo-_  
Being captain meant meeting the other teams' captains', shaking their hand, exchanging a few words. How could he possibly explain this to the foxes? They'd accepted all his previous lies without a single question but this, this was treason. He forced himself not to panic. He just needed to know one thing.  
"Who's the new captain of the Foxes?"  
If it was one of the newer recruits he'd manage it. His heart frantically poundedin his chest. It was getting difficult to breathe. To think. Matt, Dan, Renee and Allison had graduated. That left the rest of Andrew's grou-  
"Kevin Day."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey if anyone has any suggestions on how I can proceed..pls help I can't think of anything (there'd obvs be a foxes vs ravens match but before that? Should Nathaniel and max be a thing??)


	10. Chapter 10

Kevin was the only sensible choice. Nathaniel didn't know why he'd been surprised. With all the original upperclassmen gone and only the monsters and the new subs remaining, Kevin could captain the foxes, despite his shitty and ruthless attitude.  
"Why hasn't the ERC announced it yet? I've checked the news almost daily.", Nathaniel asked, remembering the few minutes he spent checking up on the foxes every day.  
"It was finalised only yesterday, but I thought you should get a heads up."  
"Why?", he inquired, curious to know why she cared enough to let him know.  
"You're going to be the captain of this team, you should know.", she replied without even an inch of her straight expression changing.  
"Coach I honestly can't accept this."  
"Then get the fuck out."

She gave him a levelled look.  
"Look I know you played for the Foxes. I know you were their captain too. But you aren't a Fox anymore. You are a Raven. Get that straight. If I get even doubt for a second that you're not giving your best on the court just cause you've changed sides I'll kick your ass to Antarctica."  
"I'll play the same way I played for the Foxes, I promise you that. But I cannot captain the Ravens. Find someone else if you want. Kick me out of this team but I _won't_ do this.", he said, returning the look she was giving him.  
He had killed, _murdered_ to get to where he was but this was the one thing that would be too much. The one thing he'd kill himself before he did. Maybe it was the Neil Josten in him or maybe it was the fact that he still hated the Ravens, but he couldn't agreed. Never to this.  
"Are you absolutely sure you won't do this?"  
"Yes.", he affirmed.  
Thea looked at him for a few minutes. He refused to break her state.  
She sighed. "Okay. This is the first and the last time I'm allowing you to have your way. I'll get someone else to do this. Get lost before I change my mind."  
He was more than happy to comply. He went back to his dorm without a word and ignored Max's inquisitive look.

The only positive Nathaniel could find to this whole situation was that the Nest was gone. No more black walls which threatened to choke him. It had also been remade above the ground now, a few miles from the stadium itself. There were windows in every room, the walls were white and light brightened the place. Nathaniel was thankful for this change. He didn't know how he would've survived any other way.

He didn't know why he had been so adamant on refusing to captain the Ravens. Actually, that was a lie. He knew _exactly_ why he'd refused. The reason almost frightened him.  
The Ravens had been the villain in his story since a very long time. Whether it was the fact that Riko and Kevin had known who he was or the fact that Riko had messed up Andrew's life further by bringing Proust into his life. The way they'd tormented his Foxes or the fact the Moriyamas probably wouldn't be as strong as they were today if the Ravens didn't exist. Leading a team to victory and being a part of it were two very different things. He hadn't got a choice in signing up for this team. He had an option in this decision, at least in some regard, no matter how minute.  
Maybe there was some small part of him, who still longed to be Neil Josten, still longed to return back to that part of his life, to the guy who would have fought all of these choices till his very last breath. He wasn't sure and he realised he didn't want to be. It would just made things even harder.  
He still hadn't figured how he'd face the Foxes, but he had not lied to Thea. He would give his best in that match even if it would be a greater personal loss if the Ravens won. He had to meet Ichirou. Had to convince him to meet Adalie.  
Or maybe losing would get him a meeting. Maybe if he played terribly Ichirou would show up to check his investment. The only flaw in this plan was that he would surely get killed. He didn't know what to do. Instead, he just lay on his bed, closed his eyes and counted to a hundred in any possible language till his brain stopped.

Practices were hard. Thea ran them to the bone. She taught them some of the old Raven drills which Nathaniel had mastered already and she taught them some new ones which pushed them to the limits. Nathaniel felt awake. This was where he belonged, no matter who he was. On court, with a racket in his hand. He felt alive for the first time in months even if it he felt like he was standing in a puddle of sweat while doing so.  
Taking a shower in front of other people was no longer a problem for him. Let these people see who he was and what he'd gone through. He had nothing to hide now.  
Practises ended at eight, leaving fourteen hungry and worn teenagers scrambling to leave.  
"I've got this years plan.", Thea said and everyone stopped.  
She came and stood in the middle of the lounge where she'd called everyone and read out the list of teams they'd be facing.  
Breckenridge. The Trojans, a few teams he'd heard of but never played against and finally the name he'd dreaded-  
"The Foxes. We'll be playing them precisely on the 11th of February. If we qualify, we'll see at least two of these teams in the semi finals. Gear up kids. This year is going to be hard, but victory should be ours. Now go and eat something. I could hear your stomachs a mile away.", she said and left the room.

"How are you still standing?", Max asked him. He had collapsed on his bed as soon as they'd returned from dinner. "I can't even feel my body."  
"You forget I've been doing this for almost four years."  
Max looked up from where his head was buried in the pillow.  
"Oh yes, Neil Josten, the notorious champion who bashed Riko Moriyama on national television without an ounce of fear. Your game against Ravens is legendary."  
Nathaniel felt sick listening to Max talk about Riko and the past. Max didn't know what all of the Foxes had done to reach that level. Didn't know how much they all had lost and gained because of Riko. He realised he missed them too much. He couldn't afford to get distracted. Getting distracted meant getting killed. He dumped his bag on the bed, took his keys and went towards the door.  
"Where are you going?", Max asked him in a tired voice.  
"For a run.", he replied and made sure to lock the room before he let his feet take him far away from his thoughts.


	11. Chapter 11

He woke up screaming. Blood and Andrew's face and his hands shaking in front of his eyes and his inability to breathe and _nothing_. That's all he could see. That's all he could feel.  
Thankfully, Max wasn't in the room. Come to think about that, he hadn't come back that night. Nathaniel didn't care.

Practice was a blur. Exy was what he needed. Needed to forget and to remember. He knew that. Knew that was the sole truth buried beneath the walls of lies. He just couldn't concentrate that day, no matter how hard he tried.  
"Lunch?", Max asked him in the locker room later.  
Nathaniel nodded.

Edgar Allen had about a million cafes and small restaurants nearby. The myriad of students who studied there could find any type of cuisine they wished for. Nathaniel and Max sat down in a smaller, lesser known cafe and ordered their food.  
"You seem a little off today.", Max asked as they waited for their food.  
"I'm not.", he replied bluntly.  
"Is this about And-"  
" _Don't_.", was all he said and Max dropped it.

The bell on the door of the cafe chimed, and Renee Walker took a step inside.  
She spotted Neil sitting at the far end of the cafe, with a friend maybe. She hadn't spoken to or seen him in months, except that one phone call with Dan.

That had been a blaring, screaming sign to do something. Dan had been so worried after that, pacing up and down wearing a hole in the carpet. She had called all of them to the Court after that phone call. Said it was urgent  
"I don't know what to do.", she'd said helplessly.  
"I'm worried about him. You know he doesn't call when he needs help. The fact that he called th-"  
"He does call when he needs help. He had called Andrew when Wymack told him he'd become captain.", Kevin said.  
  
Silence thick with guilt and grief settled over the room. Andrew was dead. But so was Neil. They hadn't saved him either.  
"We aren't Andrew.", Aaron said stonily, Katelyn tightly clutching his hand.  
"That's the fucking problem, isn't it?", was all Nicky said with a short, mad smile.  
Then the Edgar Allen news came out. Neil was a Raven and things went to shit. Wymack had called Renee on the phone and told her, "I need a favour."  
"Anything.", she had replied.  
"Talk to Neil. That kid needs some sense kicked into him." A short pause. "Before we lose him too."  
Renee did not hesitate for even a second. She knew she was going to do this, even before Wymack had called her.

She walked up to their table.  
"Neil.", she said and his head jerked up. His face went ashen and he put his burger back on the plate. The boy opposite him was unabashedly staring at Neil. Keeping a close eye on every one of Neil's movements.  
"Can we talk?", she asked him with a tiny smile.

Renee was here. Nathaniel's heart was beating too fast. _Renee_ was _here_. A Fox was here. And she was still smiling at him. He'd forgotten what home had looked like.  
"Not here.", he said. He put some cash on the table and left Max and the cafe behind.  
Renee walked in front of him, setting the pace. They reached an old, abandoned playground. It was completely empty. "It looks like a sad song", Renee said. _And so do you, Neil._ But she didn't say it.  
Then she turned and wrapped her arms around him. Neil's entire body went stiff, his hands curled at his sides, but Renee didn't let go. Didn't let go until the tension left Neil's shoulders. Until Neil's hands uncurled and wrapped themselves tightly around her. Didn't let go until he put his head on her shoulder. He was strong, the way a ship was strong. He held the burdens of the whole wide world without accepting that he too could sink someday. They didn't say anything. They didn't need to.  
"I'm sorry.", Neil whispered.  
"I'm sorry too." She whispered back.  
"You can't keep doing this Neil. It's going to kill you."  
"I know."  
"Then why do you keep doing it?"  
And he got out of her arms and became the same distant Neil he was when he'd come to Palmetto.  
His face became a mask. A mask of secrets and lies and every false thing which made him Nathaniel Wesninski.

Nathaniel felt like his insides had been clawed apart. This was too hard, but he couldn't run this time. Renee didn't deserve that.  
"I don't have a choice Renee."  
"Yes, you do. You always have a choice."  
"He killed Andrew.", Neil said, his voice raw with anger and unsaid things.  
"He killed Andrew and I can't let him live. _I_ can't live. You know that."  
Renee looked at him for a few seconds, then came forward and put a hand on his cheek.  
"There are other ways to make sure he's dead. Destroying yourself shouldn't be the first option. You can't keep doing this.", Renee she repeated softly.  
"I can't.", he said.

Renee knew he was slipping from her fingers. So she said the only thing she could.  
"Andrew would have despised you for this. He would rather you be dead than you join the Ravens. He would've put a knife in your heart himself."

Nathaniel felt like he'd been sucker punched.  
"Come home to us.", she said.  
Neil leaned into her hand, still on his cheek. Her eyes were soft, unguarded. She had been through so much.

"Neil Josten what in the name of all fucks do you think you're doing?"  
That voice. Wymack. Renee smiled at his shocked face. Smiled when Neil turned around and saw his Coach standing in front of him with his arms crossed, his tattoos prominent.  
"Pack your bags. You're coming with us."  
"But I have a deal wit-"  
"Yeah as if I give two shits. Get your ass moving. I've seen enough sap today to give me a headache."  
"I can't Coach."  
"You can't or you won't?"  
"I can't.", Nathaniel repeated.  
"If you _can't_ come with us right now, then Renee can drag you. Stop talking and go sit in the fucking car."  
Nathaniel hadn't seen or heard the car come. Renee had led the way here, he thought. Wymack had already been waiting before they came.  
Nathaniel didn't answer.  
Wymack sighed.  
"Still a stubborn bastard, aren't you? I'll get you back if you want. Promise. Now get that look off your face and go and sit in the goddamn car."

Nathaniel could've run. He was faster than both of them. And he knew they wouldn't come behind him. The Foxes knew when to let things go. He wondered what they'd do if he did run. Wondered if they'd leave him alone then. Images flashed before his eyes.  
_Rooftops. Gunshots. Andrew's neck. Blood.  Secrets. The hard ridges of his keys. Andrew's hands, his eyes, his corpse. The smell of Foxhole Court. Home. Stay._  
_Andrew would have despised you for this. He would rather you be dead than you join the Ravens. He would've put a knife in your heart himself._

Nathaniel sat in the car.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IM SORRY IVE BEEN MIA but here's this small chp which doesn't fucking make up for it.


	12. Chapter 12

Max wasn't as stupid as he looked. He was Adalie's brother after all. He quickly paid the check and followed Nathaniel and the pastel haired girl out of the cafe. She had called him "Neil". He had done that once and he hadn't dared to do it again.  
When she said it, Nathaniel's face had changed and Max hadn't liked that one bit. So he followed them. He saw how Nathaniel sunk into "Renee's" embrace. Saw how tenderly she had put a hand to his cheek and asked him to come home. No one had ever done that for him.

Then the gruff, terrifying looking man with arms adorned with tattoos came out and Nathaniel looked like he was seeing a dream. When the old man too told Nathaniel to go with them, Max almost intervened. He wasn't here only to ensure that Adalie would uphold her end of the bargain, he was also here to ensure that Nathaniel wouldn't change sides. He was dangerous. A commodity they couldn't afford to lose, not now when they were so close to the end.

  
But he couldn't step in. Three against one was no match. Renee may have looked like as pure and innocent as a swan, but Max knew that poison disguised as ambrosia was just as deadly. So he watched Nathaniel Wesninski or Neil Josten or whoever the fuck he was at that moment, drive away without a word.

"Where are we going?", Nathaniel inquired from the backseat.  
They weren't going to the Foxhole Court. It was too far. There were on a road Nathaniel had never travelled by before. He had no clue where they were going and he didn't like it.  
"Do you trust me Josten?", Wymack asked him, looking at him through the rear view mirror.  
"Yes.", Nathaniel replied without the slightest bit of hesitation.  
"Then be quiet and don't ask where we're going."  
"How have you been Neil?", Renee asked him.  
Terrified. Lonely. Murderous.  
"Fine.", he replied.  
"You've not changed."  
Andrew was dead. He had killed children. Men. Women. Senior citizens. Anyone really, just to get what he wanted.   
"I have.", he said.  
Renee smiled.  
"Are the others going to be there? Wherever we're going?"  
"Yes."  
"Even Aaron and Nicky?"  
"Even Aaron and Nicky. Nicky didn't go to Germany after Andrew. He wanted to stay here with Aaron."  
"Erik was fine with that?"  
"Yes. He is so supportive. He comes as often as he can to visit Nicky."  
"How are the others?"  
"Matt and Dan want to get married soon. Aaron and Katelyn are still going strong, there are bets on whether Aaron or Katelyn will pop the question. Kevin is, as I think you know, signed for Court. Allison's started her own women's sportswear line and I'm travelling the world." His Foxes had continued with their lives. He was glad.

"Are they mad at me?"  
A beat of silence.  
"Why do you think they'd be mad at you?"  
"Don't pretend Renee. Not now and not with me. You know why."  
"We all knew you were going away for quite some time and we knew you would...change when you did come back."  
"But I didn't."  
"No you didn't."  
Neither of them said anything for a few minutes.  
"I'm with the Ravens now."  
Renee didn't reply but Wymack did.  
"You are still a Fox."  
"Thea wanted me to be captain."  
"Did you accept?", Wymack asked.  
"No."  
"Then you are still a Fox."

Wymack stopped his car at an old, worn down warehouse which looked like it was a breath away from collapsing. The doors of the warehouse were open, like a cave luring its victims inside.  
"Neil, listen before we go inside we need to tell you something.", Renee said as she stopped him with a hand to his arm.  
Some dark, murky feeling welled up inside Nathaniel. Such conversations never went well.  
"There might be a few...differences you will notice when you go inside. It's pretty hard to explain. I think you'll have to see for yourself." He took a step inside. The interiors were partially lit. One half bursting with light and the other shrouded in darkness.

And there they all were. His Foxes. His family. His home. Dan slammed into him like a force of nature and held on so tight his chest hurt. He didn't mind though.  
"If you ever _ever_ do that to me again Neil Josten I will personally tear out every limb from your fucking body.", she said furiously.   
Then came Matt and then Allison and then Nicky. He got a variety of creative threats from all of them.

Kevin and Aaron didn't join in the reunion. They didn't even look as if they were glad to see him. They remembered he was a Raven after all.    
Kevin came forward then, his expression as stony as ever and his cheek tattoo more prominent than it had been before. Nathaniel stared him down. He wasn't afraid of Kevin Day and he never had been.  
Kevin put his hand out and Nathaniel shook it.  
"If you do this again I will make sure you never have a career again.", Kevin said.  
A short burst of something, of pride or joy, something ambiguously disquieting made Nathaniel almost smile at Kevin. He hadn't felt this for months.

Aaron nodded at him but that was it. It irritated Nathaniel how much Aaron's face still impacted him. How it still seemed to suck the air out of him. How it made him want to run till his lungs gave out and his legs broke and he never ever had to move again. He looked at Renee instead.  
"Why are we here?", he asked her.  
"Oh Neil you don't even look as if you've missed us."

"Hush Nicky. He's probably planning an escape route in his head."

And Nathaniel's world began and ended. His chest constricted and his mind bled. His heart beat and then it didn't.  
He searched for the source of this voice, knew it was a figment of his imagination. A hallucination. A pipe dream.   
But it wasn't, the man who he'd seen bleed out in front of him, who had _died_ before his very eyes, whose grave he had thrown mud on, the man who just spoke to him, his salvation and his destruction, stepped out of the shadows.

Andrew Minyard strode into the the light, twirling a knife in his hand, looking like he still owned the fucking world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YOU DARE THINK IM GONNA LET MY SON DIE also I have no idea where this is going


	13. Chapter 13

"Andrew?", he asked.  
Andrew didn't reply. Just looked at him, hazel eyes burning him to his very core. He wore a long sleeved black shirt and black pants. Nathaniel could see the outline of his armbands underneath. He looked exactly like he had when he wa-  
No. No. _No_. Andrew couldn't possibly be alive.  
Nathaniel took one step back. Then another, his blue eyes wide with shock and a sudden realisation that was slowly breaking his broken heart into ten billion pieces.  
No.  
He looked at Renee instead.  
"How long have you all known?"  
"Nei-"  
" _How_ _long_ _have_ _you_ _all_ _known_ _Renee?_ ", he said sharply.   
"About five months."  
Five months.  
What had he done in five months?

"You all knew?", his eyes roamed over everyone but Andrew.  
He felt a sudden urge to laugh.  
And Andrew still hadn't said another word. Was Nathaniel dreaming?  
The way the Foxes avoided his eyes told him as much. Only Aaron matched his stare. Nathaniel was infinitely thankful for that.  
"Yes we did.", he said.

Sam Heed. Fourteen. Nathaniel had shot him between the eyes a minute after he'd woken up.  
Kayla Singh. Twenty two. A knife to her throat.  
Tom Stone. Fifty three. Killed because he owed Adalie about thirty thousand dollars.  
Werner Smith. Eighteen. Killed because he hadn't been able to repay Adalie's favour.  
Sheila. Arthur. James. Phil. So so so many more.  
A list of people murdered by him. For him. For what he wanted. People who had done nothing to him. All dead for what he wanted to achieve- revenge.  
That's what the fuck he had done in five months.

A laugh broke free.  
He was his father. A monster. He was Nathan Wesninski's son. The Butcher's son. He had become the one person who he had loathed with his entire being. The one person he had sworn he wouldn't be. Now, what was the difference between them?

Nathaniel, with a crazed sort of smile on his lips, looked at Andrew again. If Andrew could see the torment on his face, he didn't react. Nobody did.  
So he walked out of the warehouse and no one tried to stop him.

"We should've told him.", Allison said into the terrible terrible silence.  
"No.", Andrew replied  
"This way is better.", he said as he slid his knife under his armbands.  
"Better for whom Andrew? Didn't you see the state he was in when he left?", Matt said.  
"I'm going after him.", Dan told them all.  
"Stop.", and Dan halted in her tracks.  
"That's my job.", Andrew said, with no expression of his own as he went after Neil and slammed the door shut behind him.

Nathaniel's head spun. But he didn't stop running. One step after another, the smell of fire, the sound of gunshots, his mother's ghost, everything was chasing him at once. He didn't know where to go.

The road was almost entirely empty. Barely one or two cars passed by every ten minutes. He couldn't afford to stop and think. His breaths came hard and fast.

"Want one?", someone with Andrew's voice said. How had he reached here so fast?  
Nathaniel stopped.  
"No.", he replied, his throat felt like it had been torn apart.  
He heard the hiss of a lighter and then the smell of smoke hit him. This time, it did nothing to settle his nerves.  
He turned behind. Andrew was casually blowing smoke into the air, looking as if he had not been killed, as if he had not one worry in the world.

"Who are you?", Nathaniel asked him.  
"You've not stopped asking stupid questions, have you?"  
"Andrew Minyard is dead.", Nathaniel said, feeling as if someone was burying his heart under a stone.  
"Well clearly, he isn't.", Andrew said, pointing to himself.  
"I watched him die."  
"You did."  
"Then how are you her-"  
"This is not the time or place to tell you that."

"How do I know you are Andrew?", Nathaniel knew this question sounded crazy, but he had to ask it.  
Andrew took a step closer to Nathaniel.  
"Abram,", he said in a clear voice, "I gave you the keys to my home. I told you to stay. You have a disgusting neck kink. We were on 892 per cent the last time we spoke. I told you I hated you, you stupid fuck. Then we went for a run and I got shot. Now I'm here. Is this proof enough or do you want me to write a fucking book?"

Nathaniel didn't know what to think or do. He couldn't. His head was messed up. He had accept the fact that Andrew was dead. His world had ended right there and then. Now this. He couldn't deal with or accept the fact that Andrew was alive. Not now. It was a ridiculous thought, a child's dream to even think that this was a possibility. He had no place for hope in his mangled, distorted, ugly life. No hope that he could come back from what he had done to reach this point. Who he had become.  
Nathan's son.  
He could smell Sam's blood in the air. Could hear Kayla's piercing scream. Innocent people. Nathaneil Wesninski had left Neil Josten far behind and it was too late to get him back.

"I'm sorry.", Nathaniel said, and turned around and began to run.

"I'm a vampire.", Andrew told him and Nathaniel ground to a halt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is this going to turn into the supernatural au no one (except you Kiwi_trash99, I see you) asked for?? Yes. I'm so sorry for this. (Does this mean that the summary is now click bait?)


	14. Chapter 14

Nathaniel waited in his dorm, his mind spinning. He couldn't digest the fact that Andrew was alive. It was a cruel dream.  
_Vampire_ , he'd said.  
Natahaniel didn't believe in the supernatural. It was a concept. An idea made by fanatics and crazy people, a way to keep the idea of those they loved alive. It couldn't be possible. All Andrew had said was that he'd explain later, and then promptly left without another word, leaving Nathaniel shell shocked and alone on the road. It all felt like an illusion. His mind playing tricks on him. Too much trauma, he guessed. He almost smiled at the absurdity of this fact. Too much trauma, he could almost hear his mother's ghost chuckle. 

Max came back to their dorm a few minutes later.  
"Where had you been?"  
"I had work with some friends."  
"Friends.", Max repeated, his mouth twisting while saying it, he wasn't used to such words.  
His world had been one of blood and fists. Collegues and enemies. People who could be killed and those who were not supposed to be killed. Adalie too wasn't a friend, per se. She was his sister. More like an ally.  
Nathaniel knew how he felt.  
"Who was the pastel chick?"  
Natahaniel didn't know if he was entertaining Max out of pity or to keep his mind off of things.  
"Renee Walker."  
"Fox."  
"You got a problem with that?"  
"None at all.", Max replied, raising his hands as if in silent surrender. He then went to his desk and began to do his homework. Nathaniel had made up his mind. Whatever had happened a few hours ago was just his imagination. He laid down on his bed and tried to sleep and forget.

At 8pm there was a knock on their door. Max got up to open it.  
"Nathaniel?", Max asked him, not looking behind and not opening fully opening the door.  
Nathaniel sat up, alert at once.  
The door was pushed open by force, Max jerked back.  
"Hey. What the fuck do you think you are doing here?", he asked as the door widened and Andrew Minyard stepped in.  
Nathaniel's heart stopped beating. His eyes widened and his face became as white as a sheet. It was as if he was looking at a ghost. Perhaps he was.  
"I know yo-"  
"I'm Aaron Minyard. And you were just about to leave."  
"This is my room. You can either tell me what your doing here or I'll call campus police."  
"Max?", Nathaniel said wrenching his gaze away from Andrew's face with difficulty to look at Max.  
"Just a few hours. I'll owe you."  
Max stared at Nathaniel for a few minutes and then at "Aaron" and then left the room without another word.  
Andrew locked the door behind him.

Nathaniel got up from the bed. His entire body was shaking.  
"You need to leave.", he said. He knew he wouldn't be able to tolerate this. Not again. Hope was meant for people who had something to live for. Not for him.

"I'm not leaving without explaining."  
Nathaniel's eyes took on a frantic look. He started paving up and down the small room, screwing his eyes shut. Wishing with that everything that whatever was fucking with his mind would disappear when he opened them.  
But it didn't. Andrew stood in the same spot, still as stone.  
Then he began talking.  
"I died the day I was shot. I did. Biologically. Physically. Dead. My heart stopped pumping blood, my brain stopped working, my organs began to fail. And then I woke up a week later, on the couch of one of the spare apartments in Wymack's building. There was no one in the room."  
"They sent Renee that night. She explained. She converted me. Sank her canines here.", he said, revealing the skin above his right collarbone, where two identical holes were present. "Everyone of the them, even Wymack, except you, me, Aaron, Kevin and Nicky are fucking vampires. It was a morbid idea. A child's fictional world. But it was true. They- We don't drink human blood but animal blood is fine. I can run faster than you can now. I can crack your skull open with a flick of my wrist, if I wished to. I couldn't find you. You are good at hiding when you don't want to be found."  
As if to confirm whatever Andrew was saying, two long, sharp canines slipped out from Andrew's mouth and slipped back in as swiftly as they'd come. 

Nathaniel mind battled with itself. On one hand he wanted it to be true, more than anything. But on the other hand, how could it possibly be true?  
"Lift your shirt.", Nathaniel said.  
Andrew raised a single brow, but did as Nathaniel said.  
There. A few centimeters away from his heart, a bullet hole stared at Nathaniel. It was pink, healed excepted the puckered skin around it.  
Nathaniel's head pounded. His eyes burned and blurred. The floor tilted.  
"It's you.", he said softly. Nathaniel's breaths came hard and fast, his lungs expanding and contracting, any amount of air being too little.  
Nathaniel wondered about the possibility of a God up there and whether he was pointing a finger at Nathaniel's life and roaring with laughter.

He stumbled a few steps towards Andrew, incapable of keeping his balance.  
"Neil.", Andrew said and there was something in his usually blank expression that made the world right again.  
His hands automatically moved towards Andrew's hair and tangled themselves in it. He stood so close to Andrew, they were breathing the same air. Andrew's hands slid under Neil's T-shirt. He needed to feel solid bone, needed to know that Neil was alright.  
A muscle slid in Andrew's jaw. He kissed Neil's neck.  
_"It's you."_ , Neil whispered again, looking at Andrew with his big blue eyes. All layers and secrets and every horrific wrong he had ever done melted away. All he could see was Andrew's face and all he could feel was Andrew's solid head.  
The gaping hole in the both of their lives started to shrink.

Then Andrew kissed him. Nothing mattered anymore. Nothing ever had and never would. Except this. This man in front of him.  
This kiss was soft. It wasn't the harsh, desperate one it had always been. This was a tangle of tongues. Of hands straying over each other's faces. Of horrors not being wiped off, but accepted. This was not only a kiss, it was a promise. A promise which said, " _As long as I live, with every fiber of my being, I promise I'll never leave you again. The world can fucking try_."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omfg I can't believe this is becoming a twilight au WTF why


End file.
